I’m not sure what it is, but I have this pattern when people I love go away where I feel sad and that sadness manifests itself in the behavior of a bad puppy. I misbehave in generally mild ways that really mean nothing in the grand scheme of things, and oddly enough, this misbehavior when I’m abandoned it something I love about myself.
So my mom bakes the most delicious family-recipe Chex Mix (it’s NOT Chex Mix, it’s Nuts and Bolts and it is ten million times better than Chex Mix, but for understanding’s sake, it’s similar to – but way better than – Chex Mix). Everyone in the family has their favorite part (duh, the used-to-be-cheese-Tid-Bits-before-they-were-discontinued-so-now-by-default-they’re-Cheez-Its are by far the best), but a very firm rule exists that one must NOT pick through the Nuts and Bolts. Handfuls (upon handfuls, upon handfuls) only! Until the mother migrates South for the winter, and the daughter is left to her own devices. When mom returns? The jar is devoid of all used-to-be-cheese-Tid-Bits-before-they-were-discontinued-so-now-by-default-they’re-Cheez-Its.
Or perhaps should we reference the M&M’s in the candy jar? First browns and greens, then yellows, then oranges, and – ugh – finally, if I must, the reds and the blues. Color by color we go, must to the dismay (disgust?) of the parents.
Fast forward to life in Mongolia: the man of the house disappeared for a few weeks to return home for a visit, and what did I do? Duh, bought myself a beautiful Mongolian blanket because “it was cold in our apartment without you.” No it wasn’t, I just liked the blanket.
And, finally, rewind to last night. The man was gone for one night. ONE night. And what did I do? I purchased myself the most beautiful, socially responsible, helping women around the world scarf because of course it was my civic duty to help these women, no? Don’t be ridiculous. I liked the scarf, and the man was out of town, so I bought the scarf (it could have been worse – I wanted this one too!).
BUT, at least this time my behavior benefitted not only myself! Really. Check it out: fashionABLE. It’s a beautiful little story that the company has created for itself. A story that is perfect for folks like me: folks who like pretty things, helping women, and self-indulgent misbehavior.